Football advertisements.

We all know what Youtube is best for. Football ads.

Stand Up, Speak Up <-- Don't be racist!!

Reebok: Giggs in his garden. <-- this man is too cool

Reebok: Giggs in his home. <-- Man Utd legenddddd...

Pepsi Surf <-- TOO COOL.

Pepsi Shuffle <-- Fabregas is one hillarious guy.

Pepsi Germany 2006 <-- Bavarians + Footballers = LOVE.

Renault Clio <-- Is Henry the definition of class? YES.

Joga Bonito -- Cristiano Ronaldo v. Zlatan [Eric Cantona Bonus!!]

Joga Bonito -- Thierry Henry (Honour) <-- CLASS.

Joga Bonito -- Billy <-- Billy is one lucky dork.

Joga Bonito -- 3 on 3 <-- C.Ronaldo+Robbie Keane + Fabregas vs. Rooney, Rio & Anton Ferdinand.

Carlsberg <-- As much as I think Liverpool has no class, Steven Gerrard is still pretty cute.

Henry's Home <-- Man Utd. chases Henry in his dreams!

Pro Evo 4 <-- HENRY!!!!

Adidas +10: Japan v. Italy <-- Shunsuke & bagpipe man are too cool.

The Road to Lisbon <-- THE COOLEST AD EVER JUST BECAUSE IT HAS ZIZOUUUUU

Sergio "Kun" Agüero

Okay, so I'm going to go on about how attractive and awesome Kun is. Because, really, he is.

First of all, he gets his nickname from a Japanese animated cartoon character, Kun, who, like him, is completely ADORABLE.



So he moved to Atletico Madrid last summer from Independiente, in Argentina, the club at which he became the youngest player to debut in the Primera Division de Argentina, at 15 years and 35 days, overtaking the previous record of Diego Maradona. He scored 23 goals in 53 games for Independiente. He had gotten offers from and wanted to go to Liverpool, the club he followed when he was younger, but his mother adivsed him to go to Spain, so he wouldn't have to deal with the language barrier in addition to the inevitable culture change. Now he lives with his parents, siblings, and even some extended family in his house in Madrid.

He's just eighteen, and probably wouldn't have gotten to play as much for Atleti if Maxi Rodriguez hadn't gotten injured in that Argentina v. Spain friendly (which, funnily, Kun and Fernando Torres, his Atleti teammates, both played in). He's had six goals in La Liga this year so far, one of which was from a great run against Barcelona to tie the game 1-1. He also scored an important goal in the Copa del Rey where he tied up a game against Levante in the 91st minute; Aguero scored the winning penalty kick in the penalty shootout which Atletico won 4-2. He's also just broken into the Argentinian Senior National Team, where he's made 3 appearances.

But more than anything else, Kun Agüero is, well, slutty.

slutting with a tennis player...

slutting at Independiente off the pitch...

and on it...

slutting with Fernando Torres...



and even slutting with Leo Messi...

Plus, he sings!

Kun, slutting with Los Leales.

Players of the week:

Okay. So you must have realized by now that I don't just like soccer beacuse of the sport itself. Not to say that I don't love the game-- I love it-- but, in all truthfulness, I am in it for the hot guys as well. And the dorky ones. It allows me to test out my libido in a harmless and STD free manner.


So. On this "Players of the week" thing I will mention people who I think everyone should hate, love, think is hot, feel sorry for, etc.

So. To start!

This week (this also includes the end of the season):

Feel happy for: Joaquin Sanchez. After completely dissing Aragones and the Spanish National Team, the winger has been called back for Spain's Euro 2008 Qualifiers this week following exceptionally good performances for Valencia in recent games. He really deserves that spot. They had NO reason to drop him-- he had a great World Cup and always gives his best to Spain. He was probably drunk when he said those things, anyway. See? If you're an asshole that's talented you can still succeed in life!

Respect: Didier Drogba. He's carried Chelsea, or rather, done Chelsea's shit, for the past season but especially recently. It's immensely fitting that he's scored Chelsea's last 2 goals of the season, and won them the FA Cup. Sigh, that FA Cup... I'm still sad about that loss for Man U. Oh well... Drogba deserves it.

Hate: Chelsea or Steve Sidwell. Because Chelsea's been up to much more evil, lately. Signing Steve Sidwell on a FREE TRANSFER, leaving poor Reading no money and less hopes of getting into UEFA cup next year, after barely missing out on it this season. What will Sidwell's transfer accomplish? Nothing. Think he's going to ever play? Not likely, when you're up against the likes of Ballack, Lampard, Makelele, Robben, Diarra or Michael -effing- Essein for a midfield position. I guess he'll get paid loads, though. Sigh. How could you dump Reading when there's been such promise for future success? You had a great season, why not try to top it next year? Whatever your personal take is on this transfer-- hate someone.

Be Saddened By: Ronaldinho. Getting sent off at the game against Getafe? Not good. Not good at all, especially when you're in the laughable position of being behind Real Madrid in La Liga. No, not good.

Shamelessly Oggle At: Sergio Kun Aguero. Because this man is the definition of slutty. HIS TONGUE. Okay. Too much for me... Atletico makes some attractive signings, let's just say that... I'll end up pimping him later, but just to tease you for now:

Introduction

I guess I never really introdced myself.

I'm an asian, female Californian teenager .

Sadly, I am stuck in the United States, where the majority of people don't know the differece between the portly Brazilian Ronaldo and the effeminate Portuguese one (both of whom I love).

I follow the English Premiership intensively and (disclaimer) I am a proud Manchester United fan. I won't pretend (and probably cannot pretend) that I'm not biased. I also have unexplainable loves for Wigan, Reading and Portsmouth (okay, maybe not so unexplainable: Luis Antonio Valencia is LOVE, as are huge-obese-Wigan-folk, Ulysees de la Cruz, David James, Sol Campbell...). I hate Chelsea. Fix that: I would love them if they didn't have Abramovich, Frank Lampard and Joe Cole. Or I hate seeing their names, and not Drogba and Ricardo Carvalho and Mourinho's, attributed to Chelsea's success.

I don't have any La Liga preference, but believe that Valencia C.F. is an amazing team. And as proof that I don't just like pretty players, I think Fernando Torres is completely useless, although I believe in Atletico Madrid's potential. Barcelona is amazing when they are "on", and although Real Madrid is more of a joke than anything else at this moment, they were and still can be amazing.

Despite all the diving, I like Portuguese and Italian football. I'm an Inter fan, and hate Totti and Kaka. And I think that Portuguese teams can go far in Europe as well. I'll also ocassionally check out the Bundesliga, although the style of play in that league doesn't excite me that much.

Outside of football, I figure skate [STEPHANE LAMBIEL IS MY FUCKING HERO] and enjoy basketball [GOOOOO PISTONS AND OMFG TAYSHAUN PRINCE I WANT YOUR BABIES] and art [FAUVE-ISM RULES].

Transfer rumors

Abramovich has supposedly vowed to pour less money into Chelsea now. I really don't understand this. Chelsea with money didn't do anything great, but I can't see Chelsea without money being any better off. And the rumors about John Terry and Fat Frank leaving? This is hard for me to believe, especially the ones about Terry. If anyone is staying, it's Terry. Lampard is a bit different, but really, would anyone want him after his mediocre season?

Gabriel Heinze may be leaving Man Utd for Real Madrid, papers say. As much as I would hate to see Gaby leave, I can see his situation: he's not going to be started unless Evra is injured again, as Sir Alex isn't big on rotating players, and at Real he'd play an influential and regular role in defense. Also more money, yo pienso. And he's just what Real needs-- an actual defender who won't abandon poor Iker Casillas to go foward or just stand around watching the opposing team make shots at the Real goal. So, Gaby, I hope these rumors aren't true, but if you have to leave, I'm glad it's to Real. You'd look super-cute in the kits, and have that whole Galacticos-attitude.

Claudio Pizarro is leaving Bayern Munich almost definately, but where to? Juventus, papers say! He'd be a perfect replacement for the complete shit that is David Trezeguet. Pizarro will get what he wants: good pay, and a team that has quality, experienced players who are used to winning. Maybe there'll be no Champions League, but you won't get that with Bayern, either.

A New Perspective

Well, I suppose this is meant to be my blog, but I can't help myself. I suppose I should explain first-- my younger sister, barely 10 years of age, is quite the Liverpool supporter which, more than occasionally causes tension within our household. Anyway-- today, she was "sick" and so stayed home from school. While I was slaving away taking chemistry notes, she was watching the Champions League Final and writing a running commentary on the match. For anyone who's interested in hearing the perspective of a crazy 10 year old Liverpool fangirl, here you are:

THE WHOLE LIV v MIL COMMENTARY...EXCEPT IT'S ME COMMENTATING NOT THE ESPN2 PEOPLE.

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE GAME IS STARTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND KAKA IS LOOKING UGLY AS USUAL. RUN!!!!! RUN. XABI JUST SLIDE TACKLED SOMEBODY. PENNENT ALMOST SCORED...BUT HE MISSED. AAAAAGGGG. RIISE MISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....AC MILAN SCORED ALL BECAUSE KAKA DOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I HATE KAKA SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ANNOYING THAT I CAN'T EVEN WRITE HOW MUCH I HATE HIM AND HOW STUPID HE IS. NOT TO MENTION UGLY. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AND THEY EVEN HAVE A COMMERCIAL WITH HIM AND SOME OTHER GUY. AND KAKA WINS......(SHUDDER)......KAKA IS SO STUPID AND UGLY AND...STUPID AND HORRIBLE AND DUMB AND DENSE AND GROSS AND BRAINLESS AND SENSELESS AND DOPY AND UNCOOL(COOL IN THE GOOD WAY) AND DIMWITTED AND HE IS SUCH A LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LIVERPOOL IS ATTACKING A LOT NOW. AND SOMEONE ON LIVERPOOL IS CLUTCHING HIS FACE. GERRARD GOT TACKLED REALLY BADLY BUT THEY ONLY GOT A CORNER. XABI IS YELLING SOMETING. AND KUYT WAS OFFSIDES (BARELY) BUT OTHERWISE THEY COULD'VE SCORED. KUYT FOULED SOMEONE ON AC MILAN. POOR STEVIE. EVERYONE IS PUTTING PRESSURE ON HIM BECAUSE HE'S CAPTAIN AND HE WAS AN "INSPIRATION" FOR THE LAST CUP. A PERSON ON MILAN GOT YELLOW CARDED. AC MILAN WAS OFFSIDES AND I THINK IT WAS KAKA TOO=D! HAHAHAHAHHA KAKA DOVE BUT HE DIDN'T GET ANYTHING FOR IT! BUT MASCHERANO GOT YELLOW CARDED TOO...DANG IT. HARRY KEWELL IS IN FOR ZENDEN. OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD....YES!!!!!! AC MILAN MISSED THE FREE KICK...... COME ON LIVERPOOL....UGH! HE SHOULD HAVE SHOT!!!SHOOOT STEVIE!!!!!! DANG IT...HE MISSED. POOR STEVIE. ONLY 26 MORE MINUTES IN THE GAME. GO PENNENT! DANG IT. COMEONCOMEONCOMEON.....PASS IT...UGH.... AUGH!!! NOBODY CARES ABOUT "SPORT CENTER"!!! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS! UGH STEVIE. RIISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU MISSED!!!!!!! THERE'S ONLY LIKE 20 MINUTES LEFT IN THE GAME!!!! COME ON JUST ONE GOAL! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S A HORRIBLE ONE! OH MY GOD NESTA! U ARE WASTING TIME!! HE WASTED LIKE 1 MINUTE PRETENDING THAT HE WAS HURT EVEN THOUGH HE WASN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH GERRARD! YOU MISSED! FOR THE SECOND TIME. IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CLOSE!!!!!!!! LIKE 2 INCHES AWAY FROM THE GOAL POST! PENNANT RUN!!!!!!!!! KEWELL YOU COULD'VE SCORED! I THINK CROUCH IS GOING ON SOON. HE HAS HIS JERSEY ON. PETER CROUCH IS GOING ON FOR MASCHERANO. AND CROUCH IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TOP SCORER FOR LIVERPOOL. COME ON...ONLY 11 MORE MINUTES NOT INCLUDING STOPPAGE TIME. AC MILANE SUBBED AS WELL. SHOOT PENNANT!!!UGH AC MILAN IS JUST WASTING TIME. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AC MILAN SCORED.....I HATE AC MILAN EVEN THOUGH FAT RONALDO IS ON IT. I HATE IT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH! 6 MORE MINUTES IN THE GAME......OH MY GOD! MILAN IS WASTING TIME AGAIN! HE WASTED HALF A MINUTE! YOU ARE KIDDING ME. KAKA DOVE AGAIN! CROUCH! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU MISSED! IT WAS SO CLOSE! I HATE MILAN SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!! IT'S 2-0 AND LIVERPOOL IS LOSING. AC MILAN FANS ARE STUPID. THEY JUMP UP AND DOWN SCREAMING WHEN LIVERPOOL HAS THE BALL. SOMEONE ON LIVERPOOL IS IN FOR FINNAN.I HATE AC MILAN. KUYT SCORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KUYT SCORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND CROUCH ASSISTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!! THERE'S ONE MINUTE LEFT....... IT'S 2-1! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!30 SECONDS. 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,0...BUT THERE'S STOPPAGE TIME!!!!! 3 MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!! COME ON LIVERPOOL!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!! CROUCH OR KUYT YOU HAVE TO SCORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........LIVERPOOL LOST. I HATE AC MILAN. ESPECIALLY KAKA.

Man that sucked.

All this is basically here to hide my complete sadness and bitterness about this year's Champions League-- because, really, AC Milan, who wasn't even supposed to be in this year's Champions League, against Liverpool who has had a complete crap season (just not as crap as Arsenal's) in the fucking final? I hope I'm not the only one dissapointed.

---

later

---

A.C. Milan 2-1 Liverpool.

This was something I didn't expect.

Unlike in 2005, Liverpool came into this final having beaten Barcelona, Chelsea, and, yes, PSV, but still, Barcelona and Chelsea. And, unlike in 2005, AC Milan has nothing short of a striker crisis (at least with Ronaldo cup-tied in the Champions League), as they are without Shevchenko and Crespo.

I really was very unsure of what I wanted to come out of this match, because, well, being a Manchester and Inter fan, I was nothing more than disgruntled and bitter about the two finalists. Man Utd easily destroys Liverpool on any given day, even at Anfield, as with Internazionale and AC Milan.

I do respect many players on both sides, however. The pairing of Alessandro Nesta and Paolo Maldini is nothing short of orgasmic, both in terms of talent and, well, attractive-ness (because, really, it doesn't get much better than Alessandro - fucking - Nesta, does it?). I don't really like Italians that much (I'm still bitter about World Cup, too), but it's difficult to dislike the pure class of AC Milan's centre back pairing. I'm not a big fan of Gilardino or Inzaghi, but Gattuso and Pirlo are everything I admire in a player: hardworking and consistent.

At the same time, Liverpool has Steven Gerrard, who is, admittedly, a great player (I can say this because I hate Frank Lampard soooo much more). In fact, Liverpool really cannot be classified as a 'small' or 'bad' team, because, in all honesty, their squad is quite good. Pennant, Alonso, Garcia (although he's injured), Kewell, Crouch, Riise, Carragher... you see flashes of their brilliance more than often. The problem is that you don't see them putting it together consistently, or even pulling off good results when they play badly, which is what a winning squad (AKA MAN UTD [!!!!]) does. It's not a nice fact, but it is a fact.

So, all right, I am not so biased that I can't appreciate some talent, right? But wait-- I've failed to mention someone, you say? What about that nice boy, Ricardo Kaka?

Let's just get this straight:

I really, really, do not understand what the big deal is about effing-Kaka.

Maybe it's just because he says he was a virgin when he was married, and it's nothing to be proud of because he got married to an EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD when he was TWENTY, so it's not like he had to wait that long.

Also, he wasn't able to help AC Milan with getting their asses far from relegation until Nesta came back from injury and Ronaldo was bought in January. So anyone that attributes AC Milan's success to solely Kaka is COMPLETELY WRONG.

But he is a good player, even if I seriously fail to see him as the kind of player who can change games. So is there a real reason for me disliking the dear Ricardo? Yes. A real valid reason? Yes. Did anyone see the first leg of Milan v. Bayern? And, after VanBuyten had nicely tied up the game, what does Kaka do? Go down in the box, make the PK against the reserve keeper (I still feel bad for Michael Rensing about that one), and once again, Kaka has 'saved' AC Milan.

¿Dónde están the heroics de Kaka that everyone speaks of? I fail to see them.

So Liverpool starts the game brilliantly, Pennant especially. They had trouble getting the ball into the net, (I think it was bad tactics from Benitez [sorry, I know you're usually right about these things, but seriously-- NOT STARTING CROUCH???]) but they had far more chances than Milan, who were having trouble getting the ball into their own half. So how come Milan was up first? How was that completely-influential-right-before-the-half-goal scored? Oh yes, a free kick. Who won that free kick? Oh yes, Kaka! But he's not a diver! Of course not! There was loads of contact. . Okay, so Kaka hadn't managed to break through the Liverpool defence completely (because there were, what, all 10 of the outfield players on him?), so he settled for diving right outside the box. But he still dove for that free kick, and there is nothing heroic about that.

So to Milan and Maldini I say, 'good job'. Too bad nobody cares about you because it's all about motherfucking Kaka.